Shemini
Reflection by by Gilad Shavit, graduate of Or HaLev’s Tiferet Teacher Training:
When do the deeper shifts come?
"In this week's parasha, parashat Shemini, there is a powerful connection between fire, desire, and silence. Nadav and Avihu, the sons of Aaron, the high priest, bring what the Torah calls esh zara, alien fire.
It's intense, maybe even spiritual. But the tradition teaches it's not aligned. It doesn't come from deep listening, from an authentic place.
In breathwork and mindfulness, we know this place: when we push the breath, when we try to force an experience which is not really authentic in some way.
Notice that what is natural is not necessarily authentic. For example, it may feel ‘natural’ for me to eat more and more out of habit. It comes easily, but it's also not really connected to my deep authentic self, which includes more than the body, ego, sensory desires. Often we are attached to these desires, to that fire. And when we don't get it, suffering comes because of the attachment.
The Torah says that after bringing the fire, Nadav and Avihu instantly died.
And Aaron, their father, responded with silence. `Vayidom Aharon`. Vayidom means both silence and stillness.
In another very important moment in the Bible, the prophet Elijah encounters the divine and he describes it beautifully: not in the wind, not in the earthquake, not in the fire, but in a still, soft silence. Again, the stillness and silence.
We often try to reach and achieve through intensity. I know I often try to reach through intensity, through the fire, through excessive effort and pushing. But perhaps we are learning here that the deeper shifts come in the quiet and non-reactive space, when everything softens, and we begin to listen just as we are. So today I invite us to notice, can we let go of forcing? Maybe we can practice it in the next exhalation. Just allow, allow, allowing us to be, and allowing the kol dmama daka, the still, soft silence to be heard. Shabbat Shalom."